I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
Randomize
