fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
