part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
Randomize
