I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Randomize
