Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
50% drunk capacity currently
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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