So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
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