going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
