Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Randomize
