She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
Randomize
