We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
