I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
Randomize
