They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
