She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
Randomize
