Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
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