I'm gonna have a badass scar
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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