He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
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