is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
Randomize