I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
