Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Randomize
