My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
