i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Randomize