You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Randomize
