If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
