I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
