So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize