My boss' voice literally gives me gas
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
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