Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
Randomize
