I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
Randomize
