My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
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