there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize
