Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize