Do vagina's smell?
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
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