that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
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