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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
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