i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
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