i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Brb crying the tears of my youth
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
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