It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
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