they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Randomize
