There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Randomize