He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
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