3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
Randomize
