I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
