I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
