can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
