I molested 6 butterflies tonight
Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize
