so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
Betty ford says i'm here all night
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
PS: I just woke up from my shower
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Randomize
