I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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