O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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