Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
