peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize